Getaway

Feels just like any other day. The fact that it is indeed Valentine's Day somehow isn't helping the way I thought it might. Just feeling a little down and lost. And wondering what to do. Yea the studies are piling up and I feel no pressure to do any work. Maybe it's just the weather.

I need another holiday. To clear my mind of things. To re-focus. Just want to feel less confused and jumbled-up in the head. This person that I am right now is just so unlike who I really am.

Hawaii anybody?



But I have to agree, 2008 is rather looking better after all. Hopefully this will last. And suddenly the thought of my In-Course Assessment is less than a month away. Crap crap crap.

back....again

Welcome home to Msia and IMU and studying. Feeling very tired and aching everywhere lately, just so very lazy to do anything but sleep, eat and sleep. Having enlarged lymph nodes as well. Just hope I can get better when her EOS ends.

Really want to play bball as well. Maybe it's this unhealthy lifestyle of no exercise. Rarr.

But then again, in-course assessment is in less than a month and everyone started studying already. So I should stop lazing around and do some serious studying. Hmmm.

CNY

Happy Chinese New Year 2008 to all!

Uni life resumes in 3 days, and though lectures are sometimes a bore, I really want to get back. My brain has been stagnant for far too long.

This is the longest 3 days ever. Damn. And for once I am really lagging behind in the movie/cinema section. Haven't been watching anything since January. Catch up when I get back? Or maybe not.

R.I.P

I hate this blogger post page. WHY CAN'T I LOAD PICTURES?!! Everytime got fucking error on page.

But anyway, my cat is dead. I was going to post a super-cute pic of it but wat the heck.

Dear Ginger,

May you rest in peace. I've raised you up since you were a kitten 2 years ago, I've scolded you, fed you, seen you catch and mutilate a bird, ran around like a maniac, climbed the thorny lime tree, had thorns stuck in your paws and had to pull them out for you while you meowed in pain. You have also made the neighbour's female cat pregnant 3 times you horny bastard. Great job I must say =)

You were my companion thru the good times and the hard times. When there wasn't anyone to talk to, you would rub your head against my leg. When I went thru the breakup, you sat there in silence staring at me not making a fuss of me feeding you late (maybe because you have stole food by tearing the rubbish bag you pig). When mum scolded me and I storm out of the house, you would walk around my ankles trying to trip me up telling me not to leave.

The world that you are leaving isn't the best place, so may you have a better and easier life in cat Heaven. Thank you for all the times and memories Ginger.

Love,
Jon your grateful owner and friend

For God's sake

So many things to put down, but words are just failing me at the moment. Again. Seems to happen quite often lately. Just feeling blank; my mind has gone stale and stagnant thanks to the excellent use of 2-month hols. Though it sucks, I can't wait to get back to studying in a pressured (or not) environment a.k.a IMU library. At least then I will feel the need and urge to actually read the crap. Here all the drug names just glaze across my eyes.

So hurry up 6 more days??! Shouldn't be this long! Need to go out with friends again, need to feel the freedom, need the gf. Brunei just turns me into a monster thanks to its boredom. Though she says baby monster is cute. What the. Hahaha.

Finally February

The world is indeed a superficial place to live in. Life is over-rated. Some people may go as far as saying love is over-rated as well. I just hope that that will not be the case at all.

After all, love can conquer all. Or can it?

So yea. Gearing up for CNY. My fingers are sore as hell, and my palm is well, getting better i think. I just wonder why some people just can't take the initiative to help out those in need. Rarr. Pisses me off so much. I ain't complaining. It does me a whole lot of good anyway. Builds character, as Calvin's Dad will say (from Calvin 'n' Hobbes).

A better month, perhaps?

Splat.

Human after all.

You know how things accumulate? And then it stores up inside of you until it becomes un-ignorable, like a snowball effect. You try to ignore and forget it, but it remains. Why can't we just have a rewind/erase button in our memory. It will make everything so much easily. Though life would then be boring and predictable.

Silence is golden, I know, but it doesn't make sense.

Baby,

Thanks for always being there for me =)

With the Chinese New Year approaching I have to start cleaning house again and putting up the deco cuz i am the only one tall enough to reach the ceiling and stuff like that. i guess it's one of those disadvantages. Ah well.

Happy CNY in advance to all then!

Just have to make the most out of the remaining days left here in Brunei, and try to be happy. Yep, try to be. Try try try. How hard can a person try? I don't know myself, i seem to be running out of ideas and the will to try.

And congrats to my sis on her O-level results. She did it all without my help hahaha.

Aih, every cloud has its silver lining, let's hope mine shows soon.

Spree

Rollercoaster of emotions for the past 2 days or so. Just feel so under-appreciated at times. So much so that I wish I am cold-blooded enough to go on a killing spree and murder the entire neighbourhood. But I am not. And I wouldn't. Arghhhh.

Come on, it's only 13 days left!!

Wisecracks

Oil prices still on the rise. 2008 is set to be hit by another recession. War in the middle east still goes on. North Korea continues secret tests on nuclear weapons. Osama and the Al-Qaeda still active and on the run. Hunger continues to kill millions all over the world when the rich are constantly wasting tonnes of edible food. Average tempearture of the Earth is rising and not going to stop. More and more species are becoming endangered, including the homo sapiens if we don't stop bloody rioting and killing each other.

What so great about a new year that we have to celebrate and waste money on then? Just a tradition, or is it actually worth it? Same shit another day perhaps?

Maybe I'm just too bored at home.

And i miss the gf. Hmm.

Smile

Which I am going to sing to the gf, who is stressed with work and studies. since i can't be there for her by her side.

Smile though your heart is aching;
Smile even though it's breaking.
When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by.
If you smile through your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow,
You'll see the sun come shining through for you.

Light up your face with gladness,
Hide every trace of sadness.
Although a tear may be ever so near,
That's the time you must keep on trying,
Smile, what's the use of crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile,
If you just smile.

and all is calm

Back to basics? Since the world is getting more and more complex and difficult to be in?

And so one returns to You

Heath Ledger is dead. At 28.

What a shocker.

Not cuz i loved him or Brokeback Mountain, but he was going to act as the Joker in the upcoming Batman movie the Dark Knight. And he was super suitable. Or maybe, hopefully, they have already filmed it. and I loved the movie Casanova.

Oh and baby, everything's gonna be alright okie? =) *hugs

A little more

Floating floating drifting away,
the seas beat upon the golden sand,
the sun lightens up the evening skies,
the gentle breeze took me by surprise,
the tears on my cheek had long dried up,
the fragile pieces placed back in a pulp,
the sands of time goes slowly on,
the sweet scents still lingers on,
the waiting game i'll play again,
the game which will never end.

I guess, sometimes, life is tough.

Understatement of the year there. I should get an Oscar for that.

But just have to keep my mind on the future and the big picture. And overlook the little niggles and insecurities.

All the little things piss me off so much now. Even though it may just be a passing remark or sentence or post.

Argh. What has gotten into me.

3000 word report

STINKS.

Can anyone tell me that they actually understood the requirements?!

Attn:

Ok now everyone knows I didn't post that last entry, so errrr, whatever the girlfriend says then. haha.

i knew it.

The boy's name Jonathan \j(o)-na-than\ is pronounced JAHN-a-thun.

It is of Hebrew origin, and its meaning is gift of God. Related to Nathan.

Biblical: the son of King Saul, Jonathan was noted for his manliness, generosity, and unselfishness. He saved David's life when Saul would have killed him.

As it hits me in the face

I don't know what is real and not anymore. 2008 has been a pain so far. why, oh why is this happening to us? Is it because of things like this? Running here and there? Hmm I sure hope not. For this is not what i wish to do. There is nothing more that I can do. Please please PLEASE make everything ok again.